awful week. terible games. only consolation came when gram smiled so much at dinner last night. we celebrated her birthday yesterday over dinner at west coast. we haven't seen her smile so much in almost a yr.. the atmosphere. perfect. when we sang her the birthday songs, each and every one of us. teared. that kinda feeling. it's as though u're really grateful for all that u have now. as much as we may have conflicts every now and then, we're just so grateful she's still with us, still holding the entire family together, and slowly stepping out of this horrid circle of depression. we've come a long way, almost 10 mths in this circle. it has been really tiring. we've shared her depression. day in day out we hear her groan and moan. it definitely has got to us, however small an extent it may be. and it's only at such big gatherings that u feel the warmth of a big family. at the very second itself, the coldness disappears and warmth rushes in. i love them all. even my aunt who nv seems to stop irritating me. they've all been there for us, and they are also the ones who taught me to grow and to love. :)

this aside, played 3 games over 5 days. lousy. another game tmr. and my partner went down with a tear in her ligament. of all things to happen.. only can hope for the best tmr.

trying hard to get over this feeling. i know i can do it.

and thanks loads ms lovely, for bringing me to terms with my past:)